Memories of a lifetime with family (Part 3 of 3)

Written by Chris DeFlamingh

Memories with friends
During my lifetime I met and have had some great friends. I would like to name two of them. Their names are Damian and Chris. I met Damian and Chris in 1991 and we formed a bond as friends and used to spend good times together like having parties, braai, driving around or going to watch stock cars at the old Goodwood show grounds.

As a small boy, I did not have many friends as I was very shy and did not like strangers.

It was only after I had my first job and owned the first car that I started wondering further and beyond. I got introduced to alcohol and over the years drinking got worse when I would visit friends or attend a party etc.

After a very bad experience with alcohol in February 2009, I decided that this was the last time I would ever touch alcohol ever again. I decided to stop smoking, drinking as well as drinking sodas.

That was a wake-up call for me and a turning point in my life. Everything changed for me at that point. The two friends that always stood by me through thick and thin have been Chris and Damian.

Chris was there for me for emotional support when my dad passed away in April 1995. Damian has been there for me as well many times since my mom passed away and helped me with different things in my lifetime over the years even before my mom’s passing. These are two friends I regard very highly as my own family.

This blog was written by Chris DeFlamingh

Healer, Heal Yourself?

Written by Elsabe Smit

Many people who will read this are probably either practising healers or people who enjoy receiving healing.

If you are practising healing, then you may want to stop reading now, because I can be perceived as quite blunt.

Let me ask you this: would you buy a car from a car salesman who does not own a car or whose car is full of dents? Would you accept electrical repairs from an electrician who has caused a fire in a customer’s house due to shoddy workmanship? Would you enjoy a meal prepared by a cook in a dirty kitchen? Would you accept advice from an obese seller of diet drinks?

Why am I asking this?

Because I often come across people who call themselves healers, with a cigarette in one hand and a walking stick in the other hand. When they are obese, they blame hormones rather than eating habits. When they give up cigarettes, they take up vaping without ever having done any research – if they did, they would know about popcorn lung.

Over the years I have become disillusioned with the “spiritual healing” that I have experienced, and also with the healing, I did myself, which was all about balancing auras and chakras. Straightening out auras and chakras is quite relaxing, and that state of relaxation may result in some healing.

But relaxation is not healing. Diagnosing where the body is not functioning 100% by using modalities such as reflexology or iridology or even Reiki is not healing – it is the diagnosis, which is often conveyed to the client in the same way that doctors convey their doom and gloom to patients because that was what they have been taught to do.

I am not perfect – I have my aches and pains, but I have learnt so much about healing that I know where to get help. I also know that I am the best advertisement for the healing that I help clients with.

Let us take a step back and discuss where healing comes from – and yes, it does come from Spirit, but when you understand the glimpse of the mechanics that is available to us, you will become a better healer yourself, and your clients will thank you.

Imagine three levels of consciousness. Of course, consciousness is consciousness, and there are not three levels. However, we live in human bodies, and we have a limited understanding of consciousness, which we can enhance by making these things as tangible as our minds can manage.

So imagine these three levels of consciousness. I will use the example of weight loss, but the same principles apply to any physical and mental health issue.

The first level is ethereal. This is where everything and anything exists. This is where you get “good” health as well as “bad” health from. This is where you connect with the greatest healer in this and any other Universe.

Now the question is: what do you take from that ethereal level of consciousness when you go there? Do you take the concept of “just being human” so that you can ignore the healing that your body needs? Or do you take the concept of perfect health, which is 100% possible? Remember, this ethereal level is the biggest shopping mall you can ever imagine, and you can take from there anything and everything you can conceive, without paying anything.

Once you have decided what you want, you move down to the astral level, where you give a clear definition to what “perfect health” means to you. For example, does it mean manageable blood pressure or smooth movements in your limbs or a weight that you feel comfortable with? Be as clear as possible on this point.

Ensure that your definition of “perfect health” is broad enough to be achievable. When you say “I want to lose five kilograms within the next two weeks” that is a goal that you can achieve, but a cost that is determined by the ego. When you say “I want to lose five kilograms so that I can feel comfortable in my body” that is a statement that is broad enough to be achievable.

Your definition of perfect health must be logical. For example, if you wear a size 24 dress, then wanting to wear a size 8 within a month is not logical. You will not achieve it unless you starve yourself to the point of death, and you will regain that weight very quickly because your body will go on the defensive and store food.

Your definition of perfect health must be lawful. Here we are referring to natural law and the laws of the Universe. For example, if you decide on a weight that you want to achieve and feel comfortable with, but you continue to live on fast foods and still get no exercise, your desire goes against natural law. Don’t fool yourself. Change your habits so that you can make your definition become reality.

Your definition of perfect health must be positive. Saying that “I don’t want to be overweight” is negative. The emphasis is on what you don’t want rather than on what you do want. Saying “I am already imagining my body at my ideal weight” is positive.

Once you have taken the concept of perfect health from the ethereal and defined your image of perfect health, it is time to throw away and override any previous concept of perfect health. If you went to the store and bought soft drinks laced with sugar as part of your definition of perfect health, it is now time to throw away the belief that soft drinks are good for you. You have gone to the ethereal shop and you passed the soft drink shelf, and you chose to select lovely herbal tea instead.

This approach to healing provides concrete results. What concrete results do you want to achieve for yourself before you try and apply spiritual healing to anyone else?

Gordon’s Bay and Rooiels

Written by Nina Ganci

Gordon’s Bay – Heart of the Cape!
Gordon’s Bay is centrally located close to Cape Town, Stellenbosch, Hermanus. Heart of the Cape, all 40km!

This photo is taken from one of the many Whale Lookout Points overlooking Gordon’s Bay Harbour

Gordon’s Bay lies in False Bay on the Atlantic side of the Peninsula
False Bay has warmer water compared with Atlantic Beaches in Cape Town!
Sea temperature in summer often reaches 22 °C (72 °F) in False Bay due to the South Easter wind blowing the warm Agulhas into False Bay.

Overlooking False Bay

Standing at the same Whale View Point as yesterday’s photo, you see False Bay’s glory with Cape Point on the other side. (the blue mountain in the far distance)

Did not spot any whales on this trip, hopefully, when I go again soon they will frolic in the bay

I am inviting you to join me on my first road trip since lockdown

Rooiels
Rooiels (Afrikaans equivalent of red alder) is a settlement in the Western Cape province of South Africa. The name is often written as Rooi-Els, but the name of the township was registered as Rooiels (one word). It was declared a township in June 1948, on the eastern shore of False Bay. It was named after the farm and river by this name

The town roads are narrow, un-tarred and without street lights.

Area: Total 1.15 km2 (0.44 sq mi)

Population (2011)
• Total 125
• Density 110/km2 (280/sq mi)

The main reason I am giving you the info on size and population is: I have driven to this little dorpie (hamlet) a few times, and just never could find the beach. We went in again this time and the gravel road leading to the beach was a pool of water. We decided best not to navigate through this and returned. Out of the few roads in Rooiels we took a wrong turn and found this beach instead.

Memories of a lifetime with family (Part 2 of 3)

Written by Chris De Flamingh

Memories with my Dad (Adolf)
As a kid, I did not spend much time with my dad as he was not always the emotional type but loved him to bits always. The times we did get to spend together, were always very special to me.

When I was still very small, my mom used to buy the weekly magazine that included a children’s magazine inside. Saturday afternoon dad and I would lie in bed as he read me the stories out of these magazines

In 1988 I was getting ready to embrace life and my 2-year military service, dad took me for an afternoon drive. Just the 2 of us.

We drove all the way to Fish Hoek and Simonstown where dad shares stories of his younger years as we visited some of his memories. He pointed out the house he shared with his previous wife, his favourite haunts along with his memories of that era.
Years later, I paid dad a tribute by revisiting his memories. It was a perfect way to mourn dad as I was sure I heard his voice and the twinkle in his eye as I walked around picturing dad as a young man.

The drive we took together was in December 1988 I will always remember it as one of the highlights in my life as it was one of those father-son moments we spent alone together.

In 1989 after writing my Cape College exams, dad picked me up. He noticed that I was upset. I told him I was still waiting for my results, that everyone had received theirs but I did not. Even though we had travelled for almost 40 minutes, dad turned the car around and drove back. This time around, my results were waiting for me. The first time I saw Dad with tears in his eyes was when he received the news that I had passed. The trip back drew us closer together as father and son. It is these memories that make thoughts and happy moments like this make me remember my dad as my hero. He was hard on the exterior but very much a softy on the inside.

Dad was an excellent handyman, quick to repair stoves, washing machines, door locks or any general maintenance around the home. Dad taught me well, and often I fixed the vacuum cleaner when minor repairs were needed. Thanks, Dad!

In 1993 after my dad had fallen ill, I went away on holiday for about two weeks and when I arrived back home my dad was in tears to see me and so I hugged him and told him “do not worry I am home now” I miss my dad like mad and wish he was still here on earth with me.

Memories with my Mom (Christine)
I was a mommy’s boy when I was a small kid as I was the youngest and probably got away with more than my siblings. Those were my favourite years as I had mom’s undivided attention.

I spent most of my time with my mom as my dad was at work all day. So my mom would walk me to school early in the morning and then I would get so lonely because I saw my mom walk away going home after dropping me off at school and felt very vulnerable and would burst into tears 😭 but over time it got better and I got used to school.

My mom left to attend her brother’s (my uncle) funeral in Pretoria and I would be alone with my dad but missed my mom so much. Then when she got home after about a week I was overwhelmed with excitement and could not wait to see her after I got home from school that day. I always felt my mom protected me when I was still very small. My mom was my everything at that point in my life. She and I used to play a lot of games and jokes over the years even until shortly before she passed away we had our little games and jokes we used to play. My mom told me quite a lot about her mother (my grandmother) and I wished I had known her personally.

Doubt Erased…

Poem by Ada Den Hollander

‘Did you take it?’, I ask

‘Of course, a few days ago’, you say

‘How do you feel?’, me

‘Muscles stiff, my left arm a bit sore’, you

‘It’s risky, some say’, me

‘Not at all, others say’, you

‘You believe them?’, me

‘Yes, I do’, you

‘Why would I do it?’, me

‘It’s the answer, they say’, you

‘To what?’, me

‘A strong and healthy body’, you

‘Shall I go for it too?’, me

‘Definitely’, you

‘Not sure…’, me

‘Especially recommended for the elderly’, you

‘That’s for me then?’, me

‘Yes and it’s on promotion’, you

‘Oh?’, me

‘ Five classes, half price’, you

‘Count me in’, me

‘Good girl’, you.

The 3 Sillies

Written by Grazia Martienssen

Goodday children, Flyer the Seagull here, today I will tell you a funny story that Hopper told me about one of his adventures…

Kitten and Puppy:
Felix was a greyish/brown kitten, and Teddy was a golden puppy. They were best friends and played together chasing each other around the garden.

Do you have pets? What are your pets’ names?

Having fun:
One day they met a frog named Jumper.

”Do you want to play with us?” asked Felix.

“I have been watching you two run around the garden and it looks like fun. But it’s much more fun to jump onto a Lilly leaf in the pond and sing,” said the frog.

The kitten and puppy started laughing.

“You can’t jump on leaves,” they said.

“Yes, you can, like this,” said the frog. While jumping onto a leaf and croaking.

“I think we are too heavy for those leaves,” they said while laughing.

“Don’t laugh,” said the frog crossly.

“My name is Jumper because I jump so well and it’s much more fun than running around.”

“No, jumping on leaves and croaking is silly,” they both said.

Soon all 3 of them were having a big argument about which games were the most fun. My brother couldn’t help laughing at how silly they were being. He laughed till he almost fell off the roof that he was watching them from.

Suddenly an owl flew down from a nearby tree.

“You 3 sillies have been disturbing my sleep,” he said while yawning.
“Puppies and kittens cannot jump on leaves and croak, and frogs cannot run around the garden. You are both good at what you do, and you each have your own talents.
I love watching you all do your thing.”

They all looked at each other and started laughing. “We are being silly,” they all said.

The Owl replied, “Just look at the children, Paul is a fast runner, Lucy is good at playing ball, and each of them have different talents. Their parents are also all good at different things. Their dad makes furniture, mommy sews, and they don’t fight; they work together, as should you, 3 sillies.

“Yes, you are all silly, now let me have a peaceful sleep,” laughed the owl.

And on that note, he flew back into the tree.

Do you think the owl was right? What would you have said to them?

The next day:
The next day Teddy and Felix played together nicely. Hopper played nicely with the other frogs jumping from leaf to leaf. The owl watched them for a short while and then fell asleep and slept soundly.

Which games do you enjoy playing? Are you a kitten, a puppy or a frog?

Behind the Scenes

Written by Deborah Jordaan

Good day everyone. Hope you are well and that you are blessed abundantly by the universe. Today I am writing about all the hard-working people that make a system work and get no recognition for it. The praise always goes to the senior person who just walks in after all the hard work is done.

I got my inspiration from a documentary on Egypt I was watching, where the workers work in the heat all day digging and shovelling. The labourers come from many generations of families that had been working in the dig sites. They dig up artefacts at the archaeological sites.

They have their younger children with them at the sites to see what they are doing so that their children can one day continue when their parents no longer can. They work so hard and when they reach the actual treasure the archaeologist comes and has a look at the treasure and gets the credit for it from the Egyptology society. These workers are in the background but they deserve the glory as without them no treasure will be found.

The next example of this scenario is medical staff. I do realise the senior staff of a hospital or any medical institution studied hard to get there. To me, the office staff and nursing staff are the ones that should be applauded as they do so much of the work yet the doctor comes in, checks the reports written by the ward staff and go. Yes, they work hard as well as they operate and save lives but post-op is just as important.

I have seen some doctors treat nursing staff badly as if they are mere ant in a big pool of spiders. These nurses have to take care of the patients post-op, make sure they stay alive and that their wounds are tended to.

Appreciate even the cleaners and kitchen staff as they all make the hospital system work. Feeling unappreciated causes problems in any workplace then the patients in the case of hospitals suffer as the medical staff is unhappy.

In the retail sector, the shelf packers matter just as much as a manager because they make sure that the shelves look tidy and the shop is neat. Yes, the manager has a challenging job but if the staff are treated right they will do their work properly.

It all comes down to how you get treated. An unhappy team causes problems which in turn makes the shopping experience unpleasant for the consumer and that eventually gets brought to the manager’s attention by the owner. There is always a person higher up but without the general workers, any workplace will not function properly.

Labourers on farms and plots are another example. People are so proud if their yard or garden looks immaculate. Yes, they have reason to be proud but treat your worker with respect as without that worker it will not look that neat.

While the worker is out there working the owner might be inside all warm and comfortable, which is obviously right but make the worker a warm coffee or cup of soup. A small gesture like that can put a smile on the worker’s face and earn you respect and loyalty. They are also human and if they respect you then they earn the right to be treated humanely.

In conclusion to this story, I am saying- no matter if you sweep pavements or you are Elon Musk we all contribute toward a system that keeps the world turning. Be blessed and be loved.

Memories of a lifetime with family (Part 1 of 3)

Written by Chris De Flamingh

I have had many memories throughout my life, some happy and some sad.

During the 1970’s growing up I remember we used to look after a beautiful female fox terrier who belonged to our next-door neighbour, her name was Suzi. This was my first best friend and it felt like she was my own dog as we used to take her in quite often when our neighbours went on holiday.

One sunny day it was late in the afternoon and the neighbours facing our front door had a red brick wall next to their house I was over by the neighbour playing with their kids outside in the garden. I decided I was going to climb this wall cos being a young small boy I was always very curious and up for a challenge to find out what certain things would be like after exploring them. I climbed the wall and found out in no time that this wall was not sturdy (cement plastered) and gave way as soon as I climbed it. It collapsed in an instant and I had a fright but only sustained some minor bruises on my leg. My ego was the biggest injury.

At the age of 4, I had an accident after falling into the hot tub in Youngsfield military base and sustained a fair amount of burns to my body as described in ‘my life story’.

I also had a great fear of heights and at the age of 11 or 12, I went to a school friend’s house and his dad was also in the military. They had a huge trampoline in the backyard and always enjoyed playing and jumping on it as a kid the few times I did visit them. They had a big old tree in their backyard with a wooden platform fitted between the tree branches (tree house) high up in the tree. I climbed up the tree and attempted to step across to another tree branch and my hand slipped off the tree branch and fell to the ground flat onto my back approximately 3 to 4 metres down. I had some pain but it was more so the shock of that moment as I could not believe what had just happened. I swiftly got up and walked home crying.

Whilst living in Kenwyn, Santa delivered my first BMX bicycle. I was so excited, about my first personal transport. I was independent, I was free, and I could explore. I planned all my day trips carefully. Mom prepared me a picnic of sandwiches, cold drinks and of course the much-required stack of sweets and chocolates.

Sometimes a friend would join in the fun and sometimes I went alone. My trips were as far afield as Kirstenbosch, Constantia and Newlands swimming pools. Travelling all the way from Wynberg was a good distance for a child

Other day trips that I remember were the train rides to Town (Cape Town) with mom and brother. These trips were always filled with excitement for a young little boy, a train trip followed by the smells and sights of the big city itself followed by lunch at a restaurant in The Golden Acre

My family often planned long trips to Eastern Cape or the Transvaal. Mom would always have a huge hamper of roast chicken and potatoes with rice and other veggies. The special treat was the instant puddings and jelly we ate if we were good in the 20-hour car trips

Originally as every young child, I was very close to my mom, as a typical rebellious teenager, dad was my hero and comfort. I clashed with mom for many years before our bond grew close again. Today, I think back in horror at the words I spoke to mom, but realize that I was naïve and had to learn about life.

My dad was a very strict straightforward person and did not stand for any nonsense whatsoever. If you didn’t listen, he would merely lift his big hands and take a good hard swing at us and you know what you have done wrong and believe me, it did not tickle. It hurt like hell. Those were the good ole days and I never regret my upbringing ever.

It taught me to respect and improved my character as a person.

I often climbed into dads car to play with the car switches until one day, I snapped the cable that unlocked the bonnet. My dad was very enraged and he gave me good hiding as a result. Ever since that day he always kept the car locked whilst parked in the garage.

He had to spend money to have it repaired. As a ruling because of similar events that resulted in things breaking, I stopped fiddling with other people’s property as I was always extremely curious about what a button on a radio or some or other piece of equipment would do, had I pressed it. I would always end up breaking something or something would fall and break, so I eventually learned my lesson as a kid and stopped messing with stuff that either did not belong to me or did not apply to me.

Epping Market

Written by Nina Ganci

Cape Town, colourful and beautiful. Nothing speaks volumes like the locals – the Cape Coloured. Their colourful language, culture and mannerisms, speak of the Cape.

Dad use to love going to Epping Market regularly. It is filled with fresh fruit and vegetables direct from the farms. From this point onwards they are sold to shops. Just outside the market, is a section where various vendors sell their products to smaller shops and the public.

Today, this section has been modernized and now sterile buildings are overflowing with colourful fruit and vegetables.

The trip is well worth a visit

How Writing Has Helped Me

Written by Neshni Naidoo

Writing has always been a part of my life, from as early as 9 or 10 writing creative stories for school. As a child, I listened fascinated, as my grandmother – a gifted storyteller – narrated stories of her life. I believe that this, together with a voracious appetite for reading, was my inspiration for writing.

In my teens, creative writing shifted to journaling and my diary became my best friend. I poured out tales of my first crush, the mean girls at school, the loss of my dad, and my dreams and hopes for the future. At the time, I didn’t realise how important this was for my mental wellbeing. Journaling that helped me process my emotions in a positive way. There was no-one to judge me. I was able to ‘talk’ about issues that I didn’t feel comfortable sharing with anyone else.

After graduating from university and getting married, I didn’t feel the need to journal as much. My focus was outward driven – material pursuits and career development.

1999, was however, a turning point in my life. I had been a member of a Spiritual Organisation for a few years, but that year felt the call for transformation – from outward to inner focused. I started a journey of reflection, healing and growth. Immediately there was an exponential shift in my creativity. I felt as if I was tuned into a Divine Radio Station, receiving words of wisdom and ideas for value-based rhymes and songs. All of this I recorded in my little notebook but was afraid to share – afraid that it was not good enough.

This creative streak continued even after my children were born. I made up stories and songs with a moral or educational value that I would act out and sing to them.

However, I felt adrift and unsure of my place. Motherhood was beautiful but tough. In my research, I came across non-dominant writing therapy. I would write out my question with my right hand (dominant hand), switch over to my left hand (non-dominant hand) and write my response. I was blown away by the insight that I gained during these writing sessions. I understood myself, my motivation and my behaviour much better.

Non-dominant writing therapy is said to help alleviate stress, anxiety, access the voice of your inner child, gain insight into relationships and alleviate pain. (https://www.psychologies.co.uk/non-dominant-hand-writing-therapy/)

A close friend recommended writing letters about my challenges and burning them. This was another powerful tool that helped release stuck emotions and create space for healing.
(https://www.spiritualityhealth.com/articles/2021/04/19/letter-writing-burn-ritual).

I was called to write and share my experiences but still allowed ego to get in the way. All of that changed in 2011. I gave birth to my 3rd child via C-section. The night before being discharged my gynaecologist realised that something was not right. When I had a scan done the next morning, it revealed that my colon had ruptured. I had surgery and spent three and a half weeks in hospital, hovering in an out of consciousness.

The months that followed were one of the lowest points in my life. I was not able to do much which left time for reflection. Writing once again came to my rescue. I wrote poetry to express that which I could not verbalise. It has been a process, overcoming the fear and feelings of not being ‘good enough’. It took me another 10 years before I felt ready to publish my poetry in book form. As my confidence grows, I share more. The more I share, the more inspiration I receive. I know now that I am living my purpose, which was revealed to me during a meditation,

“Write, write, write
Speak also the world needs to hear your voice
Heal the world
That is your purpose
This is why I saved you”