Road to Recovery

Written by Deborah Jordaan

Good day to all the beautiful people that follow our blog. Hope the universe is blessing you. Today I am going to tell a story of an amputee. I did write about his experience a while back where he had an operation to have his foot removed due to diabetes. Today, I will continue his experience till thus far.

After the first amputation Urban was at home for a few months waiting for his next operation to formalise – close the foot so it could grow closed where the wound was. He went back to the hospital in January but it was not a pleasant experience.

First of all, they never prepared him for what he was to see after the operation, they had removed more of his leg till, under the knee, he was devastated. His experience in the hospital wasn’t pleasant either. With it being a public hospital the conditions were dire at times. They didnt have clean linen so he had dirty linen and they had stolen his wheelchair when he was in ICU after his operation. He was happy with the nursing staff as they tried to assist him the best they could but after seventeen days and no explanation as to why they were keeping him he signed himself out.

It’s been really hard on me as his girlfriend and caregiver because he gets more depressed and frustrated by the day. When his stitches were removed the wound tore open so I have to attend to the wound more vigilantly because it is a gaping wound. With the help of my fellow nurses at my local clinic, he is doing well. They assist me with the wound and medication. I can’t be more thankful.

I find he is more emotional this time, the reality of the situation has become real to him now. I try my best to keep him occupied and I still have to keep myself sane at the same time. If his family and children were more interactive with him it wouldn`t be so difficult for him to face every day.

Being a man of great intellectual capacity he tries to keep himself strong but some days it isn`t easy. I am the only one around him twenty-four hours a day so when he needs to vent his emotions I am the lucky recipient. Though he does apologise after his outburst, I must understand he must get his feelings out.

The unfortunate thing is I also need to vent my feelings so I share my thoughts with my friends at the clinic or I speak to the doctor.

Its nice to know I have my support system as my friends and family cant always understand but they do try to listen. The frustrating thing is he is not used to a wheelchair and tries to do normal activities and falls out of the wheelchair if I turn my back for a few minutes.

The way forward is not going to be an easy road but with our patience and perseverance, we should be able to cope. We are grateful that we do have a great support system with the few people that still care enough.

We have made wonderful new friends that are also paraplegics. Will keep you updated as we go forward.

Be blessed and stay safe.

Where Are Our Children

Written by Deborah Jordaan

Hello to all our loyal readers. Without you, we could not reach out and help someone that might read our article and find it helpful. I’m writing about parents that need their children in their time of need and they are absent. This next passage I’m going to write is about a parent who has given me permission to write his thoughts.

Coming back from the hospital where my left foot was amputated I was trying to get in the house up the stairs I had to go up from behind and on my bottom. Once I got inside it was a battle trying to get into a chair as I wasn’t equipped with paraplegic aides. I took the walker and moved slowly toward the bedroom but on the turn going toward the bedroom I lost footing and fell. My carer was trying to help as much as she could but it was the first day home so we were still trying to find a way to do things. As I lay there tears filled my eyes as I realised that I was alone – where are my sons? Why cant they be there to pick me up as I picked them up when they were in pain? I finally found myself in the bed, sleep evaded me. I was wondering -who will pick me up when I fall tomorrow again?

I myself feel lonely sometimes. I have two daughters but they have lives of their own and also have challenges. I try to be there for them but I myself fall emotionally and wish they are there to pick me up when I go to a dark place. When our children are grown they seem to think they are no longer a part of us as they have their extended families also to spend time with. Many children do so much for their parents and others disappear. Where do our children go? As parents grow older they need to feel loved and like they matter and not that they are only an ATM to their children and a place to stay when times get tough. Acknowledge us as parents. Make parents feel like they are a part of your life and make sacrifices for them as they gave up many things the day you were born.

Dont go knocking on your parents door when you hear they are ill. Are you already counting the money you will inherit when they die or are you really concerned? Remember your parent has worked really hard in life to get where they are in life and of course it will all go to you but dontcount your chickens before they hatch. Your parents didnt count pennies when you were born they did what they had to do to get you grown-up, educated and tried to teach you respect toward mankind. No matter what your mother had to do – she did what she had to do to feed and clothe you so dont throw her away when she is in need. Your father gave up hes aspirations and had you in mind as he was sweating at work everyday to earn a living, so its time you wipe the sweat from hes brow if hes ill.

Don`t let society consume your humanity and make you part of the rat race. Keep your humanity and empathy. Be the child your parents dreamt you would be one. Make them proud. Whether you are a cleaner or pilot, just love and respect your parents and everyone else.

May the universe bless you with abundance and bring love and light to you and your loved ones in the month ahead.