Relationships Defined By Bipolar by Debbie Jordaan

A warm welcome to our regular readers and hello to our new readers. Hope the articles on the site inspire and motivate you. This month I’d like to talk about how my bipolar has affected my personal relationships in my life and my journey to a functional relationship at my ripe old age of 47.

I’ve had bipolar since a child but never realised that till I got into adulthood. My relationship with my mom was difficult but all she tried to do was show me that I was not to settle for less. My ex husband was my way out when I was younger to get away from my mom but of course getting divorced proved that it was not my best plan – I at least got to become a mom myself. Never regretted my daughters.

As I went through my life I met some men that verbally abused me, messed me up even more than I already was. The only best friend I had was my best friend I had known since I was five years old. He was married at the time so we did’nt try any relationship. He separated from he’s wife so we thought we would give being a couple a chance. We got it right for three years till I started freaking out and having bad bipolar episodes. I was in a downward spiral and he could’nt deal with it. He found someone to talk to and who was he’s comfort zone in he’s chaos with me.

I can’t blame only him for our downfall and him having an affair with the lady. It eventually ended up that we just let go and parted. Took me a while to get over as he was my dream man even when I was married he was always the one that got away. My expectations were obviously far fetched regarding him Id say. Lesson learnt there – best friends aren’t always destined to be lovers or to be married.

​I always sent out into the universe that I would like to meet someone older than myself and an intelligent person. Intelligence is more appealing to me than a muscular body. Looks can’t keep your mind captivated. The universe answered me a few years ago. I met a wonderful man. Intelligent, wise and very understanding. He is well read and keeps me captivated every time he speaks, the rest definitely followed at a slow pace. This time I tried to get it right. He gets my bipolar – he understands my psychological mind and always has good advice which I follow often. We have our moments but we are a couple in the process of discovering each other’s ways and quirks.

Thank you for giving me the chance to tell you about my life. Be blessed by the universe and may other nature take care of you.

Motherhood and Letting Go by Debbie Jordaan

Hello everyone and welcome to the new readers to this wonderful site. This month the Universe tested me to the extreme and beyond – As a mother, Partner and Human being. With all that is happening to our planet right now I’m hoping my article can take you away from your own thoughts for a while.

Being a mom of two girls is sometimes trying as I worry about them constantly though they are adults and living their lives. As a mother you get intertwined in their lives and sometimes forget that you once were young and also didn’t take your moms advice.

My one daughter is diabetic and many more complications – mommy of two beautiful souls – my two grandsons. She is the best mommy she can be in her health situation – though her extended family make her life hell and as it’s her husband’s family I can’t really intervene and defend my daughter as she tells me she will sort them out. So all I can do is be there for her in an unbiased way to prevent any further problems.

My other daughter is a career driven young lady and is going through some soul searching. I really like her partner – as she is my child and all I can do is love her and listen to her no matter where the road takes her. My wish for her is that she achieves the best she can be and strive for happiness. She is elusive and chooses not to share her trials in life. The only time she shares anything with me is if she has already decided what to do. Her happiness is all that matters to me.

​Sometimes being a partner is difficult as he is needy and I’m so used to being left to my own choices and devices. Needy in a good way and I still get the freedom I need and time to give to others that also need me. He accommodates my religious beliefs and my bipolar without judgement.

My bipolar has had a field day this month as well so at any given time when I feel like doing anything I’m happy and content even if it is for a short while. I have to be strong as no one else is going to do it for me. We are in control of our own emotions and avoid people that make us feel like we are worth less than how we should be feeling. So letting go of toxic people is the best strategy for anyone.

The universe has tested me for a reason and no matter what I’m always grateful for what I have no matter the situation. I have abundance of people that love me and I am content with what I have. Thank you mother earth for your abundance of beautiful souls in my life.